Has your relationship gone stale? Are you bored? Are you tempted to be disloyal? Here are eight ways you can resurrect your relationship. The dating world is challenging at best. We all want to find the person that we will spend our lives with.
This means we must kiss many frogs before we get to the proverbial prince, princess, or other. When we find someone that we like, we have to think twice about making things work before discarding them. Relationships take time, effort, and work. If you’re not prepared to put that work in, staying single is a safer bet.
So, for all of you out there who want to save their relationship, here are some of the best tips on the internet for resurrecting it.
The top eight tips for breathing new life into your old relationship
We scoured the Internet to find the best steps to help you out of your fix. If you want to resurrect a failing relationship, try these things before you give up on it.
1. Take some time to reflect
Do you know where it was that your relationship went wrong? If you can identify the areas where you and your partner are having the most difficulty, you should rectify some of your problems. This means taking full responsibility if you are the one at fault.
Usually, however, these situations require both partners to have hurt one another to some degree. Take time away from each other to reflect on how you might solve these problems. Sometimes that time apart can be all it takes for you to realize and appreciate what they do for you. Equally, that time apart may help you know that you need to be on your own instead. It is healthy to give each other space in a relationship.
2. Revisit boundaries
According to psychologists, setting boundaries makes it easier for you to ask for time or space when you need it. In addition, it can reaffirm the values that brought the two of you together in the first place. Resetting your boundaries means you can inform your partner of what you will and won’t accept in a relationship.
Boundary setting also helps improve identity and mutual respect. When we get into relationships, we can feel like we are losing ourselves to the other person. Stepping back and revisiting boundaries can help to assuage this.
3. Get Physical
When your relationship lacks physical intimacy, it will start to fizzle out slowly. Asexuality is one thing, but unless this is a consented fact you both discussed at the beginning of your relationship, then it may be unfair on your partner.
Physical intimacy doesn’t have to mean “maintenance sex,” As NBC put it. It can mean holding each other’s hands and giving each other a kiss goodnight, and hugging. Human beings crave physical affection. This isn’t about the adage of “if you don’t give it, they’ll get it somewhere else.” This is about something as simple as your hands brushing over the broccoli.
4. Get Creative
If your relationship is healthy otherwise, but you are getting bored in bed, you would not be the first person to experience this. Sleeping with the same person all the time can be downright repetitive. If you don’t do something about it, sex will start to feel like a chore.
As soon as it becomes a task, we start losing that physical intimacy we talked about earlier. If you need advice on being creative, we recommend you have a read at the Bedbible.com blog for inspiration. It never hurts to study up a little and surprise the one you love, even if that relationship is healthy.
5. Give your relationship time
As well as giving each other time, you should give your relationship time. If there has been a breach of trust or a betrayal, then this is particularly important. If you are committed to resolving the issues within your relationship, you have to talk those issues through and then give each other time to make the necessary changes. If you don’t give each additional time, you may be throwing away something that could have been fixed if you had just waited that little bit longer.
6. Speak up
If you are unhappy about something your partner has done and you don’t mention it to them, you have no right to hold that over them. Your partner isn’t psychic. Well, 99% of your partners aren’t psychic. So you have to tell them what is going on if you want to give them a chance to fix things.
Speaking up comes back to setting those boundaries at the outset. It may be that at the start of the relationship, you didn’t realize a limit was necessary, but now you feel left out. Revisiting those earlier stages can help. Whatever it is you’re feeling or thinking, you should speak up. You can’t resolve an issue if you don’t talk about it.
7. Manage your expectations
Sometimes we are harder on our partners because we hold them in higher regard than anyone else. We put them on a pedestal, and then we wonder why they fall. Managing your expectations means reassessing what you expect from your partner. What is it that you would change about them to make your relationship work? What is it about yourself that you would change?
There are those of us who live with a constant inner monologue that tends towards criticisms. You may find that this voice turns on your partners as well. This is because we hold them in such high regard that we expect them to know better. Unfortunately, we often hope for them to understand better without voicing those thoughts. This leads to toxicity within the relationship and must be resolved.
8. Go Back to Dating
Be honest about this. When was the last time you and your partner went out for a meal? When was the last time you took your kids to your mum’s and decided to spend the weekend together? If you don’t make time to celebrate the fact that you’re in love, you might ultimately lose that love.
That’s a high price to pay for something you have worked so hard on. Go back to dating. Take each other out. Complement each other’s hairstyles. Make the time. You should start to see an upwards change in no time.